Intimacy Through Talking

Communicating is my very basic need, sometimes even before food or sleep. But we all have a need to connect with others, in some way, shape or form. When things go wrong, we want to be given comfort and direction. During happy moments, we typically want to share our joy with the world.

Who do you run to when times get tough? Who shares your happiest moments with you? For me, it's my husband. It doesn't mean I don't ever open up to anyone else but it does mean that Chris always knows what's going on in my life and that I withhold nothing from him. We agreed when we married that we want to be and stay each others very best friend.

I'm a talker. I need to talk things through with someone to feel secure, to feel close, to understand and to serve as a sort of check and balance for myself. My best friend isn't a talker. But he's making the effort to try to talk more because he knows I need it. In turn, I have to learn to shut up and listen to what he has to say. And I'm always glad when I do.

Sometimes, because of my nature, I run to Chris and later realize that God wanted me to run to Him. It wasn't wrong to discuss it with Chris, or get his opinion. But God wanted me to run to Him first and rely solely on Him and His strength to get me through. Many times, when I talk to Chris, I expect the mere conversation to supply with me that sense of calm that I should be relying on God to supply.

I crave intimacy with Chris. The way for me to get that is through communicating. I'm also learning that God wants me to have that same desire for intimacy for him. When I do He blesses me beyond anything I can put into words. He's teaching me that my relationship with Him is a lot like my marriage: If I want this relationship to work, I have to become less self-centered (die to self), confide in Him, and learn to shut up sometimes.