It Takes Time

I fall on my face A LOT. And when I get back up and try again, it isn't long before I fall again. Again and again I fall and become wounded and again and again I get back up and wonder how much more falling I can take. Thoughts creep in causing me to doubt and I grow weary.  I get frustrated because these things God commands of me seem to be the hardest things to do.

I was telling my husband just last night about how I grow frustrated with myself for not getting it right and for taking so long to learn the things of God. Somehow I have it built-in my head that He expects me to get it right --right then. Although the Christian walk requires a heart change and isn't something we can just do on our own, I recognize my need to be what He has called me to be and I tend to rush it. I grow impatient and my frustrations do nothing but land me in a puddle of discouragement.

This morning, I was reading the Parable of the Sower in the book of Luke, in which Jesus spoke of three types of hearers. First, there is the hearer that never really hears and instead Satan takes the seed (God's word) before it can be planted so that the person can never be saved. Then there is the hearer who hears and receives it with joy but since he or she is not rooted in it, they only believe for a while and fall away. Third is the hearer who hears and accepts it but the seed is later choked by riches and cares of the world. Lastly there is the hearer who not only accepts the word but endures wholeheartedly with steadfastness....they "bear fruit with patience."

"As for that in the good soil, they are those who, hearing the word, hold it fast in an honest and good heart, and bear fruit with patience." Luke 8:15 ESV

It takes time. There it is..the answer to my frustrations straight from God himself and His timing couldn't have been more perfect. It takes time and patience to grow and bear fruit-- I'm not just a slow learner afterall. It's not expected that change come overnight and that idea is merely a lie from Satan- meant to discourage us from enduring. It doesn't come easily because if it did, we would all be doing it and no one would ever fall away.
 
Living in the flesh while being led by the Spirit requires constant focus, dedication and endurance and if you take your eyes off Him for a split second you run the risk of falling. If you don't guard your mind and capture every thought, you wind up with a mess in your head that eventually makes it way to the heart. I've heard many people say that you can go overboard with your faith but that tells me that those people were never serious to start with.
 
Even though He is working in us always - we still battle the flesh. The human side of us wants to come out and run the show. It's inevitable that we will come out with cuts and scrapes if we try to go against the flow. But over time, if we endure, the hope is that our flesh gets a dose of discipline from the head disciplinarian Himself.
 
"But the one who endures to the end will be saved." Matthew 24:13
 
Notice it doesn't say, "He who tries" or "He who endures for a while". He calls us to endure until the end..no matter how hard it gets or what it takes. He also promises to walk with us if we follow Him, meaning we constantly give up what we want for what He wants.
 
For me it's reassuring to know that He doesn't expect me to get it right immediately, and to be changed in such a short time. Changing doesn't depend upon us, and if it did the change would only be on the surface--superficial change. Since He works on His own time and He knows what He's doing, we can rest assured that true change will come in time---IF WE ENDURE. I'm quite sure that if He worked too fast on us, we would suffer from shock of seeing all our junk at once. And I'm not sure that my heart could take it all at once.

Therefore, I appeal to you to to endure and persist. Keep getting back up because it's in those falls that we grow character and learn humility. Never give up.

Project: Application

Many people say they believe, but I can't help but wonder: Is everyone who claims to believe that Jesus is the Christ really going to heaven?

The Bible is clear that many will will proclaim to know Him yet very few actually do. In my own life, I struggle to apply the things He teaches me. My flesh puts up a mighty good fight and I must sadly admit that the flesh wins a lot more than it should. But at the same time, I have no question in my heart that Jesus Christ is the Son of God and came to set me free from the binds of sin. It seems to me that learning about Christ is the easy part. Applying it is a whole other story.

I pray and I read and I ask for wisdom. But then He shows me significant things and I stand there helplessly struggling to apply it. It reminds me of the first time in my own life that I was given makeup. I stood there wondering, "So, how do I apply this stuff?" Say what you will but finding knowledge is only half the quest. It's when you've learned to apply that knowledge to your own life situations that you become wise and hold great understanding. Frankly, not many people really have true wisdom and the mark of proof is in our lives.

Non-Christians and Christians alike look at those of us who are outspoken about our faith and they wonder why they should bother following Him at all. They see our shortcomings, because we have many. They see our faith and they wonder what is different about us if our faith in the man who is the Son of God doesn't make us perfect. It doesn't make sense to the person who hasn't been broken. It's nonsense to the one who hasn't seen himself in the light of God. Frankly we can't blame them. We grow frustrated with our own selves because we know the truth yet cannot even master the process of application.

I've struggled with this a lot lately. I've learned a lot in the past few months, but at times it seems I'm only seeing more and more ugly in myself instead of improvement. I beat myself up over it because I wholehearedly want to honor our great God who has delivered me over and over. I want people to see his miracles in me and I want them to know how much He loves us to care for us when we frankly do nothing to warrant it.

But in the end, it's not about me..it's about Him. It's not whether I ever master His teachings perfectly, but whether I persist in asking Him to change my heart because only a heart change can make us new. A heart change is a process, not an out-patient procedure. As Joanna Weaver said, "It takes a process to make a product."  The process requires that we fight to the end and never give up.

But the one who endures to the end will be saved. Matthew 24:13 ESV

Those words ring in my heart like church bells. When I read them, I wondered why they stuck in my head. I felt the need to read them over and over. But now I realize that He's been telling me all along to keep seeking, praying and thirsting. It's not whether we get it all right in this life, but whether we've endured 'til the end, and whether we've done so with faith in His abilities, not our own. Faith leads to a heart change and a heart change leads to obedience. Never make the mistake of thinking that our obedience is of our own doing.

He is faithful to those who love Him, and no matter how hard it gets--He is right there next to us. I pray that you will be fight the good fight and be faithful enough to endure 'til the end by seeking, thirsting and praying because only Jesus Christ can satisfy the needs of our souls. I hope you'll pray the same for me...