His Kind of Love

"He is jealous for me.
Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree
Bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy.
When all of a sudden I am unaware of these affictions eclipsed by glory
And I realize just how beautiful you are and how great your affections are for me, " The David Crowder Band.

I studied these words as I read along while listening to this song.
The song's first sentence captured my attention earlier this week on my way to work. I have continued to be awed by what I feel was made clear to me that day. In that moment I thought about how I feel when someone I love dearly isn't acting right, living right, or giving me the attention I want from them. I realized just how this hurts so much..how rejected, helpless and distanced I feel when this happens to me.

As I began to think about this more and more, I suppose I never thought that the great and wonderful God I worship feels jealousy or frustration. I think subconsciously I see these emotions as negative and therefore sinful. But they are not sinful if they do not cause you to sin, right? RIGHT!

Wow, this is pretty significant to me! To think that my wonderful God, with enduring love, feels rejected, frustrated and even jealous when my relationship with Him is not intimate in the utmost way. This is because when I am not close to HIM, I cannot grow adaquately.

I am somehow wandering out there.. lost, not permantley or completely because there is this spiritual connection I have to Him, from being saved. And that will never be forgotten, Not by Him and not long by a person who truly once had a relationship with God.

I think back over the course of the last few months, and how much He has been in my heart and how much He has talked to my heart, steered me and revealed more and more of Himself and His ways to me. I feel so blessed for this...for His time and his patience and His love in that he would work so hard in me...no matter what it takes.

Because... I don't always make it very easy..but HE never gives up.

As I think about the words of this song....what do they mean to me?

He is jealous for me. (Jealously that we all know when we want something badly.)

Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree
Bending beneath the weight of his wind and mercy. (His love is so strong and so powerful that it sweeps through us, causing a stir..and this with this love, comes a wrath for those who ignore Him. Even though the strength of this wrath could take us out, He protects us in the storm.)

When all of a sudden I am unaware of these affictions eclipsed by glory.
And I realize just how beautiful you are and how great your affections are for me. (But then after experiencing God's protection even under His own wrath, we forget the pain, in the midst of being awed by HIS beauty and profound love.)

"Ohhh. How he loves us..."

And oh how this makes me want to live even more for Him...He deserves the best of me, even though it can never be enough for His holiness.

Perhaps the lyrics truly mean something else, but to me...it has a different meaning. I love the work He is doing within me...and I will forever be His for it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TJyW55AXJAk