Tuesday, November 29, 2011

A Woman's Influence

Many females have virtually no idea of the very influence God has given to us. We, as females, are given quite a bit of authority and influence, just as men also are given --only in different roles. Ours isn't to be undermined or downplayed because it isn't any less important, only different. We hold in our hands the very direction in which our families go and in turn where society goes. And if you know the influence God offers you as a woman, you'll be far less likely to be so passive about the way you dress, the things you say, the tone you use or the way you carry yourself. As women, if we fulfill the role He meant us for--which is far more encompassing than most women ever imagined, He will honor and protect us in ways that surpass any relationship on earth.

Before I go any farther, I don't want to sound like some liberal women's rights activist or feminist. Nothing could be farther from the truth...it's not about our ability as women so-to-speak as it is the ability of God to work in us. But we cannot overlook the aspect of honoring His plan for us as women. We girls are given a lot, and to whom much is given--much is also expected. I think it's high time we stop living under the lies we've been told that we have no affect and start owning the influence that we have as women--both  in our families and in society.

I started out reading a book that, to be honest I didn't want to read. I moaned and groaned as I ordered James Dobson's "Bringing Up Girls" on my Nook. I knew perfectly well God was leading me to it and I went like a reluctant child with my head and shoulders hung down. Aside from the fact that it was over 300 pages long, I didn't want to read it mostly because raising my oldest daughter has been such a challenge to me emotionally, mentally and spiritually. As a mother, she's challenged every single hair on my body to stand up straight and take on new ways in order to ensure that she got the very best.  It's up to me to teach her how to be a lady--how to carry herself or how to make the right decisions.
And let me just say that quite frequently, I feel so incapable of doing this because I'm nowhere near being the perfect woman. I fail everyday. Now, I have yet another little girl to raise...who has far more spunk and determination than that baby girl from 11 years ago and it's time that I build more confidence on this matter, and I think some of you are in the same boat with me.

Women and men are different..only a crazy person will argue with that. But how different are we? We, females bring the communicative, relational and emotional factors into the mix. Males in general aren't nearly relational as we girls are, but have other God-given abilities that we females don't have. Males are different, mostly because of the way in which they were formed in the womb. At about 8 weeks or so after conception, the communication part of a male's brain is flooded with testosterone, thus washing away much of the communications region and the connections to the emotional parts of the brain. As a result males aren't typically as emotionally connected, communicative or relational.

We, girls, also have a natural inclination to connect several different events, people, places and / or things and have a pretty good idea if just one person or part will be negatively impacted. We think about aspects of things that our male counterparts don't--and that's purely okay because that's our dish to bring to the table. It's an important factor because, as those of you who are moms know, that's what it takes to run a household efficiently. And why should they be like us or we be like them? There is no need. God created us very differently so that when we marry, we complement each other. And when we do, we get to shine if we do our jobs as we're meant to. We get to be our husbands glory, and what woman doesn't want to make her husband proud?

Because of our abilities to relate and get down and dirty with the deepest of our emotions, we have a powerful influence in our families, workplaces, churches and other places we tend to hang out. We bring a factor to the table that is unique. Simple things like the way we carry ourselves or our moods impact everything around us. Think about it-- if you're a mom every single member of your household is influenced by your behaviours, your moods and every aspect of who you are even when you don't think it's important.

We all know moms who let their daughters dress too revealing or overindulge their kids. Of course no mom is perfect, just as no dad is BUT have you ever noticed that mom can be the real show stopper when it comes to the way her daughter presents herself, acts or dresses? Have you ever noticed that WE teach our girls about the opposite sex and that teaching determines whether or not they'll respect their male counterparts? Come one girls, we have more say influence and say-so in these kids lives than we give ourselves credit for. We determine so much about them simply in the way we present ourselves.

Most of the stories we hear of rehabilitated marriages and families have started with the changing of the woman's mind or attitude, not the man's. Yes, I said MOST. We're emotional but we don't have to be irrational or out of control. We don't have to let our feelings rule us and ruin us. I'm not saying you can do it alone but if we ladies will be more of what we're meant to be instead of falling into the idea of what the world thinks we should be, our husbands and our children stand to benefit the most.

As women, our relational influences are far more reaching than just our husbands and our children. But what if you were more careful of your influence and simply changed only the direction of your own family? Let's take another step back. What if we each changed our own attitudes first? What if we ask God to change our own hearts? I know for a fact it leads to the changing of more than just your own heart. Have you ever seen a man reject a woman who wants him with her whole heart, a pure, loving and respectful heart? Not if he has a heart...Every man wants his wife to love and adore him.
We females influence everything we touch and that's not by chance. It's by God's plan. We alone, can start changing the shape of society just in our our households. I encourage you to ask God to work through you to shape your family and our society. If you want change, I encourage you to be brave and let it start with you. You won't regret it.


  1. A friend of mine suggested I read your blog. I'm glad I did.

    Thank you for the gentle way you empower women. We have a responsibility to influence the world for God and it starts in our own little homes. I look forward to stopping back in :-)

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  4. Paula, thanks so much for your words of encouragement.